In case you haven't noticed, John Barrowman has been very, very honest in recent weeks. The Torchwood star's latest revelation? That he once "cr**ped" himself on stage. "I was doing a dance number and I kicked s**t over two people in the front row because I had diarrhoea," he recalls. How charming. If you've ever had anything remotely "organic" kicked on you by John Barrowman, we'd like to hear from you. We can offer advice, a shoulder to cry on and, most importantly of all, a forum to get your own back!

10. Jane Fonda
You know, you're never too old to use a naughty word on breakfast telly.

9. Michelle Ryan
What did she miss most while shooting Bionic Woman in Canada? Her family? Her friends? Nah, good old Marks & Sparks.

8. Johnny Borrell
The Razorlight rocker isn't suitable company for Harry Potter starlets, apparently.

7. Beth Ditto
Like the rest of us, the Gossip singer is a little bit obsessed with David Tennant.

6. Lily Allen
The gobby popstrel reveals she has a crush on Ricky Gervais. Why, Lily, why?

5. Take That
Congratulations on your Brits success, boys!

4. Christina Aguilera
Baby or no baby, naked Sundays are still on the agenda in the Aguilera household.

3. Sharon Osbourne
The highlight of this year's Brit Awards? Mrs. O telling Vic Reeves to "p**s off you p****ed bastard".

2. Zac Efron
The High School Musical star reveals his darkest secret... he's a hyowge American Idol fan.

1. John Barrowman
Remind us never to sit in the front row at a Barrowman show.