Did anyone else's dad not care about Father's Day? - General Discussion

Finky · 18-06-2007, 14:52

My dad doesn't really go in for birthdays, Christmas etc. Not that he's a miserable git, he just prefers giving presents than receiving them. And he really doesn't like Father's Day, though he encourages Mother's Day because he knows it matters to my mum.

Anyway. He told me last year to not get him anything and I knew he meant it, so I didn't and he was happy. This year I didn't get him anything and it was fine, but my mum reckons I should at least have got him a card

and now I feel slightly guilty, especially as he's gone on a business trip until Friday.

Just asking, based on what I've told you, did I do the right thing? And does/did your dad care about Father's Day at all?

Porcupine · 18-06-2007, 14:54

Its hard to say as we dont know your dad. You said that you thought he meant it - and so thats fine.

Personally, although Fathers Day is a gimmick, i like to get my dad a card if nothing else. I mean, you can pick up a card for 99p, so it doesnt exactly cost the earth.

I wouldnt feel guilty though. You did as you dad asked.

sistine · 18-06-2007, 14:55

My dad always say's that father's day is a marketing ploy designed to make card companies money ... which I kinda agree with, and really I show my dad all year round how much he means to me ... saying that I did buy him a card, and I always search out ones that have special meanings, or say exactly the words I want to say.

rochesteruk · 18-06-2007, 15:04

I asked my kids to make me a card and gift,means a lot more.

PIDGAS · 18-06-2007, 15:06

Yes it is a marketing ploy. Just go into any card shop on the day before Fathers Day, Mothers Day etc and see how busy they are!

It is much better IMO to do something nice for your dad instead even if it's just a phone call to say you're thinking of him or cook him a nice meal.

lemoncurd · 18-06-2007, 15:08

I don't bother with any of these `Hallmark' days. It's all shallow sentiment.

Porcupine · 18-06-2007, 15:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by lemoncurd

I don't bother with any of these `Hallmark' days. It's all shallow sentiment.

Yeah, but some of us like a bit of shallow sentiment

lemoncurd · 18-06-2007, 15:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by Porcupine

Yeah, but some of us like a bit of shallow sentiment

I love you.

kays_dad · 18-06-2007, 15:10

I wouldn't want a shop bought card, but kay and lilsis made me some cards and very proudly did me a display of their handiwork downstairs: I wasn't allowed to come down until they were ready. That is cute.

You sound a little older than them .. what about taking your dad out down the pub one evening or lunchtime? I know I'll appreciate that in 12 or so years time once they're old enough.

Finky · 18-06-2007, 15:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by PIDGAS

Yes it is a marketing ploy. Just go into any card shop on the day before Fathers Day, Mothers Day etc and see how busy they are!

It is much better IMO to do something nice for your dad instead even if it's just a phone call to say you're thinking of him or cook him a nice meal.

Recently I've started helping him out on Father's Day etc, just making his life a bit easier, since he doesn't want anything. This year he and my mum went out for the whole day - I think he actually forgot it was Father's Day! - and I stayed in and looked after our 3 dogs (one is a puppy), which allowed them to go out for the whole day.

I wouldn't have thought about it if my mum hadn't said anything

But she's quite big on these kinds of present-giving days - I make a huge fuss of my mum on Mother's Day etc because she wants it - whereas he isn't.

Finky · 18-06-2007, 15:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by kays_dad

I wouldn't want a shop bought card, but kay and lilsis made me some cards and very proudly did me a display of their handiwork downstairs: I wasn't allowed to come down until they were ready. That is cute.

You sound a little older than them .. what about taking your dad out down the pub one evening or lunchtime? I know I'll appreciate that in 12 or so years time once they're old enough.

That's what I did for my dad when I was little

(I'm 18 now, ftr) The pub idea sounds good! Last Mother's Day my brother and I took the family out for a meal - I drove so my folks could drink and my brother and I split the cost.

Porcupine · 18-06-2007, 15:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by lemoncurd

I love you.

Awwww ..... luv you too .... big fluffy bear hugs coming your way

kays_dad · 18-06-2007, 15:13

T.Finky, sounds to me like you've done just what your dad wanted and he's happy. That's what counts ..

kays_dad · 18-06-2007, 15:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by T. Finky

That's what I did for my dad when I was little

(I'm 18 now, ftr) The pub idea sounds good! Last Mother's Day my brother and I took the family out for a meal - I drove so my folks could drink and my brother and I split the cost.

Yeah, just wander down to the local, buy him a couple of beers and have a bit of a chat with him. It sounds like he'd love that .. I know I would.

Finky · 18-06-2007, 15:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by kays_dad

Yeah, just wander down to the local, buy him a couple of beers and have a bit of a chat with him. It sounds like he'd love that .. I know I would.

Thank you

I'm going to text my brother now and arrange for the three of us to do something this weekend, seeing as he's moving out next month and I'm off to university!

Luca000 · 18-06-2007, 15:21

Don't think mine really cares. I was forced to sign a card and give him some whisky and a pair of socks. Only thing I'd give him is a black eye. Miserable, moaning, self-obsessed and selfish is the best way of describing him.

kays_dad · 18-06-2007, 15:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by T. Finky

Thank you

I'm going to text my brother now and arrange for the three of us to do something this weekend, seeing as he's moving out next month and I'm off to university!

Perfect. Spending a bit of time with you both will mean much more to him than a bit of paper. Sounds like a top bloke, your dad.

Finky · 18-06-2007, 15:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by kays_dad

Perfect. Spending a bit of time with you both will mean much more to him than a bit of paper. Sounds like a top bloke, your dad.

He is

He was explaining chaos theory to me over breakfast this morning, delightfully random

He's away till Friday now, boo.

kays_dad · 18-06-2007, 15:33

Funnily enough, I was telling kay about fractals looking at a bit of bracken when we were all out for a walk on Saturday .. she got the idea of the repeating pattern, so we left it there. She is only 6, after all.

Incidentally, we did all stop at a pub for lunch ..

Smeggypants · 18-06-2007, 15:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by T. Finky

My dad doesn't really go in for birthdays, Christmas etc. Not that he's a miserable git, he just prefers giving presents than receiving them. And he really doesn't like Father's Day, though he encourages Mother's Day because he knows it matters to my mum.

Anyway. He told me last year to not get him anything and I knew he meant it, so I didn't and he was happy. This year I didn't get him anything and it was fine, but my mum reckons I should at least have got him a card

and now I feel slightly guilty, especially as he's gone on a business trip until Friday.

Just asking, based on what I've told you, did I do the right thing? And does/did your dad care about Father's Day at all?

if your dad's happy not to participate then there's no problem.

I don't do christmas or birthdays. I don't buy anything for anyone and they don't buy anything for me. No problem

sarum · 18-06-2007, 15:54

I've tried to ignore Father's day for years...it didn't seem appropriate somehow.

But I still cried when my daughter had a huge bouquet delivered to me yesterday...

Finky · 18-06-2007, 15:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarum

I've tried to ignore Father's day for years...it didn't seem appropriate somehow.

But I still cried when my daughter had a huge bouquet delivered to me yesterday...

Aaw

If I'd sent mine flowers, he'd probably just accuse me of buying them off my mum, as she owns a florist

sarum · 18-06-2007, 16:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by T. Finky

Aaw

If I'd sent mine flowers, he'd probably just accuse me of buying them off my mum, as she owns a florist

LOL....

I was very touched; I think she's felt a bit awkward about reminding me that I'm a father for a while. I guess she's starting to come to terms with the situation a bit...

Murraymar · 18-06-2007, 16:13

My Dad passed away a number of years ago but he always thought Father's Day was a "commerical racket". We used only give him a card and even then he used to raise an eyebrow.

p.s. he wasn't a miserable git, just wasn't his buzz

Phil 2804 · 18-06-2007, 16:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by T. Finky

My dad doesn't really go in for birthdays, Christmas etc. Not that he's a miserable git, he just prefers giving presents than receiving them. And he really doesn't like Father's Day, though he encourages Mother's Day because he knows it matters to my mum.

Anyway. He told me last year to not get him anything and I knew he meant it, so I didn't and he was happy. This year I didn't get him anything and it was fine, but my mum reckons I should at least have got him a card

and now I feel slightly guilty, especially as he's gone on a business trip until Friday.

Just asking, based on what I've told you, did I do the right thing? And does/did your dad care about Father's Day at all?

My Dad didn't even mention it, never has. We have such a good relationship year round that a card and a gift is a meaningless gesture.

Last Saturday I helped lay some new turf on his lawn, he appreciates that 100 times more than a £2 card that will end up in the bin after a week or so.

18-06-2007, 14:52	#1
Finky Forum Member Join Date: May 2006 Gender: Female Location: Englander invading Scotland. Services: rubbish fake accents. Posts: 3,871	Did anyone else's dad not care about Father's Day? My dad doesn't really go in for birthdays, Christmas etc. Not that he's a miserable git, he just prefers giving presents than receiving them. And he really doesn't like Father's Day, though he encourages Mother's Day because he knows it matters to my mum. Anyway. He told me last year to not get him anything and I knew he meant it, so I didn't and he was happy. This year I didn't get him anything and it was fine, but my mum reckons I should at least have got him a card and now I feel slightly guilty, especially as he's gone on a business trip until Friday. Just asking, based on what I've told you, did I do the right thing? And does/did your dad care about Father's Day at all?

18-06-2007, 14:54	#2
Porcupine Forum Member Join Date: Jun 2003 Gender: Female Location: In the Pub Posts: 13,368 Blog Entries: 1	Its hard to say as we dont know your dad. You said that you thought he meant it - and so thats fine. Personally, although Fathers Day is a gimmick, i like to get my dad a card if nothing else. I mean, you can pick up a card for 99p, so it doesnt exactly cost the earth. I wouldnt feel guilty though. You did as you dad asked.

18-06-2007, 14:55	#3
sistine Forum Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Northumberland Services: SKy +, Bt Broadband Posts: 1,118	My dad always say's that father's day is a marketing ploy designed to make card companies money ... which I kinda agree with, and really I show my dad all year round how much he means to me ... saying that I did buy him a card, and I always search out ones that have special meanings, or say exactly the words I want to say.

18-06-2007, 15:04	#4
rochesteruk Forum Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 219	I asked my kids to make me a card and gift,means a lot more.

18-06-2007, 15:06	#5
PIDGAS Forum Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 3,432	Yes it is a marketing ploy. Just go into any card shop on the day before Fathers Day, Mothers Day etc and see how busy they are! It is much better IMO to do something nice for your dad instead even if it's just a phone call to say you're thinking of him or cook him a nice meal.

18-06-2007, 15:08	#6
lemoncurd Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Gender: Male Location: Bristol Services: Freeview (Fusion FVRT200 DVR); BeUnlimited 8Mb Posts: 23,333 Blog Entries: 1	I don't bother with any of these `Hallmark' days. It's all shallow sentiment.

18-06-2007, 15:10	#9
kays_dad Forum Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,484	I wouldn't want a shop bought card, but kay and lilsis made me some cards and very proudly did me a display of their handiwork downstairs: I wasn't allowed to come down until they were ready. That is cute. You sound a little older than them .. what about taking your dad out down the pub one evening or lunchtime? I know I'll appreciate that in 12 or so years time once they're old enough.

18-06-2007, 15:13	#13
kays_dad Forum Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,484	T.Finky, sounds to me like you've done just what your dad wanted and he's happy. That's what counts ..

18-06-2007, 15:21	#16
Luca000 Forum Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 169	Don't think mine really cares. I was forced to sign a card and give him some whisky and a pair of socks. Only thing I'd give him is a black eye. Miserable, moaning, self-obsessed and selfish is the best way of describing him.

18-06-2007, 15:33	#19
kays_dad Forum Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,484	Funnily enough, I was telling kay about fractals looking at a bit of bracken when we were all out for a walk on Saturday .. she got the idea of the repeating pattern, so we left it there. She is only 6, after all. Incidentally, we did all stop at a pub for lunch ..

18-06-2007, 15:54	#21
sarum Forum Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Gender: Female Location: Wiltshire UK Posts: 2,294	I've tried to ignore Father's day for years...it didn't seem appropriate somehow. But I still cried when my daughter had a huge bouquet delivered to me yesterday...

18-06-2007, 16:13	#24
Murraymar Forum Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Cork, Ireland Services: Sky, Eircom Broadband Posts: 4,016	My Dad passed away a number of years ago but he always thought Father's Day was a "commerical racket". We used only give him a card and even then he used to raise an eyebrow. p.s. he wasn't a miserable git, just wasn't his buzz