Im so stressed with Uni, should i give up? - Advice

DEADLY_17 · 05-11-2009, 13:06

Im doing my 1st year at uni, and im am finding it so hard im only 2months in but already they Essays, courseworks have got longer the teachers just keeping giving essays out. im currently making 5 min documentary but the group has no communication, im producer and im not talking to the director at all everytime we walk past each other he never says anything, they keep cahnging the idea one min he is happy with it then he decides he hates it. i reaally just feel like giving it all up, but i know i will regret it

uni really is so hard im having panic attacks and cant sleep at all.

sayeds33 · 05-11-2009, 13:32

which course are you doing? and at which uni? are you staying there or not?

about the courseworks and essays, how long are they? 500 words? or 5000 words? sometimes essays are given out at the start of term but dont need handing in till different times in the year. im in my 2nd year and we got all our courseworks and essays in the 1st week but one is in at the end of this month, one is in at christmas, one is in after christmas, and the last is in for march.

About other people, you will need to work with them and some people are big huge C words but you've just gotta club together and make it work. Dont play nice with anyone you've gotta be blunt with arsey people other wise you'll either find that you've done all the work yourself or you've got sweet FA done at all because of the bickering. if you really cant handle your colleagues tell your seminar tutor, perhaps they can talk to the others or even move you into another group. Dont let others control you or get you stressed, when you get your certificate in 3 years time it will say Deadly_17 got this grade, not Deadly_17, tom and harry.

Dont drop out either, especially because of other people. You chose this degree because you wanted to. Where are you gonna get if you keep wimping out whenever the sh1t hits the fan?

susie-4964 · 05-11-2009, 13:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by sayeds33

Dont drop out either, especially because of other people. You chose this degree because you wanted to. Where are you gonna get if you keep wimping out whenever the sh1t hits the fan?

Exactly. Life is difficult, that's the way it is. It's also a two-way thing, and you get out of it as much as you're willing to put in. Dropping out just because it's a bit hard and no-one talks to you is very silly. Why not talk to them first? Maybe they all feel the same way.

Spethyla · 05-11-2009, 14:40

Are you on speaking terms with the rest of the group? Because if so it might be best to discuss with them and try come up and decide something, theres always one person who's an idiot about stuff, and the fact you mention its him who keeps changing his mind suggests he thinks he's in control. He isn't, theres a big hint in the fact its 'groupwork' and you really need to try and sort stuff out with other people, whom hopefully you can get in contact with and work with. Try talking to teachers, I'm fairly sure they'd be able to give you their student numbers so you can get in contact by email.

About the essays it seems strange you're getting them so soon, I'm 2nd year too like sayeds33, and I got all my essays for the year the first week, but my first isn't due in until the middle of November, then another 2 in December, it was the same last year and seems to be the same with my housemates from what I've gathered, although of course all universitys/courses are different but it still seems strange.

What I would suggest is buying a uni diary and filling in all your work due in. I'm an English student so I write down what book I'll be looking at each seminar, and then in a different colour all my deadlines, then I go through and look at when I'm free and decide when to plan/when to write them. It helps a lot and saves a lot of stress because I've filled in whats happening when, (though admittedly I'm just one of these terribly organised people who would stress out if I didn't do it) but I did the same for one of my friends and he said it helped him a lot in terms of stressing over essays.

Don't give up though, you'd have to seriously hate everything to make it worth quitting.

Barbella · 05-11-2009, 16:28

Its far too soon to give up.

Speak to a tutor/lecturer in regard to the problems with the documentary.

In fact I would say speak to as many people as possible as the stress you are feeling adjusting to uni is compounded by the fact that you are not talking to people.

You might be surprised at how much better you feel once you start airing your views and problems.

LittlePolly · 05-11-2009, 16:34

My advice about uni is unless it is completely unbearable keep at it. I was having panic attacks and was so stressed beyond belief last June I wanted to pack it all in and thought I wasn't going to pass. Come results time I got one mark off a first.

Just breathe, talk to your tutors, make lists of what needs to be done and when to do them and try and enjoy yourself

Punkchick · 05-11-2009, 17:15

Yes don't give up yet! I had exactly the same feelings when I was in my 1st year, there were tears, panic attacks, and generally feeling out of control, I was very close to loosing it at one point. I very nearly quit but stuck at it, I am so glad I did, it was the best thing in the end, and I wish I could go back and don it again!

Things do get better, and it will make you a stronger person. Try and find some positives to being there and concentrate on them, good luck!

Slick Nick · 05-11-2009, 19:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by DEADLY_17

Im doing my 1st year at uni, and im am finding it so hard im only 2months in but already they Essays, courseworks have got longer the teachers just keeping giving essays out. im currently making 5 min documentary but the group has no communication, im producer and im not talking to the director at all everytime we walk past each other he never says anything, they keep cahnging the idea one min he is happy with it then he decides he hates it. i reaally just feel like giving it all up, but i know i will regret it

uni really is so hard im having panic attacks and cant sleep at all.

Judging by the above prose, I can see why you'd struggle with academic work.

Why not quit and have a baby? Seems to be a good money-earner.

jodzybob · 05-11-2009, 20:23

Slick Nick is obviously an intelligent being....

Firstly don't drop out, but do things that will make your life a little easier. If you don't already have a diary and a study plan, or some sort of weekly to do list then give something like a that a try, so you know when you can complete each piece of work and this in itself will help relieve a bit of stress.
Most unis offer a support service and your problem is a very common one so there will be plenty of people who can help you out if you go and chat to them.
And try to sort out things in your class. Next time you have a meeting tell them as calmly and simply as possible that you feel communication is poor and outline a strategy for the group, for example who will do what and when you will next meet to discuss. Let everyone have their say in case theres underlying issues within the group that you're not aware of, and try to keep everyone happy with where things are going.

Anyways, good luck, chin up, and make sure you're not just working or worrying about it, make some time for yourself and do what you love. Unis a great place to try new things so get involved with something new and see if it doesn't make you a bit more positive

Jaxxfan · 05-11-2009, 21:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slick Nick

Judging by the above prose, I can see why you'd struggle with academic work.

Why not quit and have a baby? Seems to be a good money-earner.

Troll much?

The OP may not be studying English and, to be honest, it's quite obvious from their post that they're unhappy and the words are just tumbling out.

So shut it if you don't have anything positive to offer

mumbles26 · 05-11-2009, 21:11

please don't be too quick to decide to drop out, you may really regret it. Aside from the communication problem with your team, is the course interesting you? If it is then you must work hard to solve the problem you're facing at the moment - easier said than done perhaps.

I wish I could give you some better advice but for now all I can strongly recommend is don't quit - try, try and try to work things through

good luck

cnbcwatcher · 05-11-2009, 21:55

I'm in my second year and we have a lot of assignments and stuff and sometimes the pressure gets too much but I realise it'll be all worth it in the end. Also there's one particular lecturer I have who's incredibly annoying and she's getting on my nerves.

DEADLY_17 · 05-11-2009, 22:31

Thanks for the advice people.

But

I am now happy

I talked to my lectura today and he made me think twice, I spoke to my group for our documentary and made it clear I am boss I thought why should I let you make me leave, in 3 years I'm gonna be in a great job....hopefully. So yeah I feel much better after taking to my teacher and Reading your guys comments

thank you

Soundburst · 05-11-2009, 23:26

Good lad. You made the right choice.

A lot of courses put a lot of emphasis on team work. . .if you're placed with people who don't give a toss it can affect your mark. It's best to have a word with your lecturer if you feel that your assignment is struggling as a direct response of others not pulling their weight.

Chunkeymonkey66 · 06-11-2009, 00:04

What are you studying?

Hogzilla · 06-11-2009, 10:33

Never drop out - speak to someone - a tutor or counsellor or whatever they have set up for you there. If it got unbearable even then - you'd so regret dropping out (and have to pay back the loan anyway), so if you really continue to feel like you're struggling, you should be able to look into transferring somewhere else. Maybe to do something else entirely, or a degree course in the same field but that looks more 'you'. My niece just walked out of uni in her second term (after rpeviously seeming to be really happy there so it came as a shock to everyone back home) and I don;t think she's ever been happy since. If I;d known she was even thinking of leaving - I'd have sorted her out with the help she needed to transfer. Then you can leave and start again next year. But I wouldn;t leave without having the transfer set up and it's one possibility you should raise with your tutor/counsellor.

Things may also settle down - you are still adjusting, remember. It's early days.

ETA - Oops just realsied you're OK now anyway but will leave that advice to tand inc ase anyone else reading this feels like you.

05-11-2009, 13:06	#1
DEADLY_17 Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Services: Virgin Media Posts: 3,409	Im so stressed with Uni, should i give up? Im doing my 1st year at uni, and im am finding it so hard im only 2months in but already they Essays, courseworks have got longer the teachers just keeping giving essays out. im currently making 5 min documentary but the group has no communication, im producer and im not talking to the director at all everytime we walk past each other he never says anything, they keep cahnging the idea one min he is happy with it then he decides he hates it. i reaally just feel like giving it all up, but i know i will regret it uni really is so hard im having panic attacks and cant sleep at all.

05-11-2009, 13:32	#2
sayeds33 Forum Member Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 113	which course are you doing? and at which uni? are you staying there or not? about the courseworks and essays, how long are they? 500 words? or 5000 words? sometimes essays are given out at the start of term but dont need handing in till different times in the year. im in my 2nd year and we got all our courseworks and essays in the 1st week but one is in at the end of this month, one is in at christmas, one is in after christmas, and the last is in for march. About other people, you will need to work with them and some people are big huge C words but you've just gotta club together and make it work. Dont play nice with anyone you've gotta be blunt with arsey people other wise you'll either find that you've done all the work yourself or you've got sweet FA done at all because of the bickering. if you really cant handle your colleagues tell your seminar tutor, perhaps they can talk to the others or even move you into another group. Dont let others control you or get you stressed, when you get your certificate in 3 years time it will say Deadly_17 got this grade, not Deadly_17, tom and harry. Dont drop out either, especially because of other people. You chose this degree because you wanted to. Where are you gonna get if you keep wimping out whenever the sh1t hits the fan?

05-11-2009, 14:40	#4
Spethyla Forum Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 9	Are you on speaking terms with the rest of the group? Because if so it might be best to discuss with them and try come up and decide something, theres always one person who's an idiot about stuff, and the fact you mention its him who keeps changing his mind suggests he thinks he's in control. He isn't, theres a big hint in the fact its 'groupwork' and you really need to try and sort stuff out with other people, whom hopefully you can get in contact with and work with. Try talking to teachers, I'm fairly sure they'd be able to give you their student numbers so you can get in contact by email. About the essays it seems strange you're getting them so soon, I'm 2nd year too like sayeds33, and I got all my essays for the year the first week, but my first isn't due in until the middle of November, then another 2 in December, it was the same last year and seems to be the same with my housemates from what I've gathered, although of course all universitys/courses are different but it still seems strange. What I would suggest is buying a uni diary and filling in all your work due in. I'm an English student so I write down what book I'll be looking at each seminar, and then in a different colour all my deadlines, then I go through and look at when I'm free and decide when to plan/when to write them. It helps a lot and saves a lot of stress because I've filled in whats happening when, (though admittedly I'm just one of these terribly organised people who would stress out if I didn't do it) but I did the same for one of my friends and he said it helped him a lot in terms of stressing over essays. Don't give up though, you'd have to seriously hate everything to make it worth quitting.

05-11-2009, 16:28	#5
Barbella Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Services: cheese and biscuits Posts: 2,854	Its far too soon to give up. Speak to a tutor/lecturer in regard to the problems with the documentary. In fact I would say speak to as many people as possible as the stress you are feeling adjusting to uni is compounded by the fact that you are not talking to people. You might be surprised at how much better you feel once you start airing your views and problems.

05-11-2009, 16:34	#6
LittlePolly Forum Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 945	My advice about uni is unless it is completely unbearable keep at it. I was having panic attacks and was so stressed beyond belief last June I wanted to pack it all in and thought I wasn't going to pass. Come results time I got one mark off a first. Just breathe, talk to your tutors, make lists of what needs to be done and when to do them and try and enjoy yourself

05-11-2009, 17:15	#7
Punkchick Forum Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 96	Yes don't give up yet! I had exactly the same feelings when I was in my 1st year, there were tears, panic attacks, and generally feeling out of control, I was very close to loosing it at one point. I very nearly quit but stuck at it, I am so glad I did, it was the best thing in the end, and I wish I could go back and don it again! Things do get better, and it will make you a stronger person. Try and find some positives to being there and concentrate on them, good luck!

05-11-2009, 20:23	#9
jodzybob Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 372	Slick Nick is obviously an intelligent being.... Firstly don't drop out, but do things that will make your life a little easier. If you don't already have a diary and a study plan, or some sort of weekly to do list then give something like a that a try, so you know when you can complete each piece of work and this in itself will help relieve a bit of stress. Most unis offer a support service and your problem is a very common one so there will be plenty of people who can help you out if you go and chat to them. And try to sort out things in your class. Next time you have a meeting tell them as calmly and simply as possible that you feel communication is poor and outline a strategy for the group, for example who will do what and when you will next meet to discuss. Let everyone have their say in case theres underlying issues within the group that you're not aware of, and try to keep everyone happy with where things are going. Anyways, good luck, chin up, and make sure you're not just working or worrying about it, make some time for yourself and do what you love. Unis a great place to try new things so get involved with something new and see if it doesn't make you a bit more positive

05-11-2009, 21:11	#11
mumbles26 Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 575	please don't be too quick to decide to drop out, you may really regret it. Aside from the communication problem with your team, is the course interesting you? If it is then you must work hard to solve the problem you're facing at the moment - easier said than done perhaps. I wish I could give you some better advice but for now all I can strongly recommend is don't quit - try, try and try to work things through good luck

05-11-2009, 21:55	#12
cnbcwatcher Forum Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Gender: Female Location: Anywhere CNBC is Services: Cable with CNBC Posts: 2,779 Blog Entries: 4	I'm in my second year and we have a lot of assignments and stuff and sometimes the pressure gets too much but I realise it'll be all worth it in the end. Also there's one particular lecturer I have who's incredibly annoying and she's getting on my nerves.

05-11-2009, 22:31	#13
DEADLY_17 Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Services: Virgin Media Posts: 3,409	Thanks for the advice people. But I am now happy I talked to my lectura today and he made me think twice, I spoke to my group for our documentary and made it clear I am boss I thought why should I let you make me leave, in 3 years I'm gonna be in a great job....hopefully. So yeah I feel much better after taking to my teacher and Reading your guys comments thank you

05-11-2009, 23:26	#14
Soundburst Forum Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Services: VM V+, Phone, 10MB, PS3, MUFC Posts: 616	Good lad. You made the right choice. A lot of courses put a lot of emphasis on team work. . .if you're placed with people who don't give a toss it can affect your mark. It's best to have a word with your lecturer if you feel that your assignment is struggling as a direct response of others not pulling their weight.

06-11-2009, 00:04	#15
Chunkeymonkey66 Forum Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 1,013	What are you studying?

06-11-2009, 10:33	#16
Hogzilla Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,896	Never drop out - speak to someone - a tutor or counsellor or whatever they have set up for you there. If it got unbearable even then - you'd so regret dropping out (and have to pay back the loan anyway), so if you really continue to feel like you're struggling, you should be able to look into transferring somewhere else. Maybe to do something else entirely, or a degree course in the same field but that looks more 'you'. My niece just walked out of uni in her second term (after rpeviously seeming to be really happy there so it came as a shock to everyone back home) and I don;t think she's ever been happy since. If I;d known she was even thinking of leaving - I'd have sorted her out with the help she needed to transfer. Then you can leave and start again next year. But I wouldn;t leave without having the transfer set up and it's one possibility you should raise with your tutor/counsellor. Things may also settle down - you are still adjusting, remember. It's early days. ETA - Oops just realsied you're OK now anyway but will leave that advice to tand inc ase anyone else reading this feels like you.