Strictly Limericks - Strictly Come Dancing

winenroses · 26-10-2007, 21:07

How about a limerick thread? I'll start off with Claudia.

There's a quirky young lady called Claud
Who on It Takes Two's highly scored.
We loved her long fringed,
With her lips paley tinged,
But it seems with that look she's now bored.

So she's now wearing 'Farrah' type flicks
As her PFM shoes she high kicks
While 'dancing 'with Len
Who Masters her when
She muddles her quick quick slow quicks.

We love how she goes crashing on -
In a good way - she cannot go wrong.
Claud, you're soooo sweeeet
You would be hard to beat
You're a ten - we award you the gong.

It's a start!

winenroses · 27-10-2007, 11:36

I like to see Anton get cross
And show us that he is the boss
He may be 'ambidextri' (?)

Who cares, he is sexy!
But that would be poor Erin's loss.

Cat Balou · 27-10-2007, 14:25

Limerick writing is harder than I thought but here's my attempt!

There once was a dancer called Kate
Whose tango made the judges irate
But her partner Anton
Refused to be outdone
And their samba was brilliantly great

x_malibubabe · 27-10-2007, 14:59

This is my lame attempt.... you're right, it is hard!

One of the best is called Tish,
Partner Darren's a bit of a dish,
Looking good with a pout,
The audience will shout:
Lilia, you better watch out!

& another...

Little Welsh boy Gethin,
Has looks that'll send you to Heaven,
Camilla's so lucky,
But forget the nooky,
He's mine twenty-four-seven.

0=]

Cat Balou · 27-10-2007, 15:13

I'm getting into this now. The limericks may not be great but we're having a real laugh thinking them up!

Each weekend I’m glued to my telly
To watch dancing by pretty young Kelly
She twists and she turns
And how Brendan yearns
But her love is an actor called Billy

Ian Waite is a dancer with flair
James Jordan has talent to spare
Vincent is funny
Matt C is a honey
And Brendan's Paso has me gasping for air!

Cat Balou · 27-10-2007, 15:38

Last one for today, I promise!

Kenny Logan is trying to win
By showing his fans lots of skin
The Beeb thinks it wrong
And bought him a thong
But I keep thinking about what might have been

winenroses · 28-10-2007, 11:53

There's a rather strict lady Arlene
Who those Hot Gossip days has long seen
But she's still lewdly lusting
At manly hips thrusting
Is she Hot Hot or is she Has-been?

Trumbles · 28-10-2007, 20:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by winenroses

How about a limerick thread? I'll start off with Claudia.

Hey winenroses, always a pleasure

. You've captured the lovely Claudia very nicely. (Don't forget to release her tomorrow or there'll be no show.

)

I seem to be endangering my position on these forums at the moment, so I thought I'd stick a quick limerick in now, just in case I get disappeared:

With no legs or rhythm, poor Kate
Might seem to have much on her plate
She said: 'Hey! I can't dance!'
...and did therefore advance
Other egos have had to deflate

littlemadangel · 28-10-2007, 20:42

There's a lovely, young man called Jones
Whose looks leave the girls shivering to their bones
With a sexy smile from his lips
He shows off his hips
But he still has to listen to the judges groans.

(Its my first attempt)

bean_of_sb · 28-10-2007, 21:02

There once was an actor called Matt,
Who's first dance was particularly flat,
but each week he's improving,
his hips are now moving,
and he's king of the floor every Sat

Sat meaning Saturday!

winenroses · 28-10-2007, 21:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trumbles

Hey winenroses, always a pleasure

. You've captured the lovely Claudia very nicely. (Don't forget to release her tomorrow or there'll be no show.

)

I seem to be endangering my position on these forums at the moment, so I thought I'd stick a quick limerick in now, just in case I get disappeared:

With no legs or rhythm, poor Kate
Might seem to have much on her plate
She said: 'Hey! I can't dance!'
...and did therefore advance
Other egos have had to deflate

Hi Trumbles - hope you stick around, unlike Kate!

CAMBER · 28-10-2007, 21:05

Great limericks everyone!

winenroses · 28-10-2007, 21:07

cat balou, x_malibubabe, littlemadangel, bean_of_sb, keeeep Limericking. Great stuff, thanks for your contributions, and you're all my favourites.

CAMBER · 28-10-2007, 21:12

That Sottish young man called Ken
Each night dreamed of getting a ten
So he danced with his kilt
Flying up to the hilt
Showing why he's the best of the men!

PeachUK · 28-10-2007, 23:23

There once was a Judge who gave ten
But he never will ever again
As Arlene has sworn
That his guts will be torn
If he ever rates Brendan again!

It's pathetic I know.. but I'm still thinking

(Love the others btw!)

winenroses · 29-10-2007, 13:55

The judges were not looking happy
Their faces as sour as a nappy
Gaby and Penny!
Who knew? Well not Kenny -
Now they're all spinning round in a flappy!

jive bunny · 29-10-2007, 14:27

The judges had given another tongue lash
For dancing a samba like a car crash
Anton and Kate
Should've have met their fate
But frustratingly rescued, making SCD a hash!!

*Nikie* · 29-10-2007, 15:47

My attempts

There once was a girl called Ola
Who went round with a pink feather boa
The judges made her cry
Because her husband had to say bye
That poor little girl called Ola

There once was a judge called Arlene
Who claimed to be the best we'd seen
She'd scream and shout
And make an awful pout
Oh how could we forget Arlene

Trumbles · 30-10-2007, 05:02

After Saturday's exit our Gabby
Has reason to be more than crabby
Ken should hide every knife
Lest it be that his wife
Should suddenly come over stabby

(I like Gabby, in case this gives the wrong impression. I just like lazy rhymes even more.)

One of the judges, named Craig
Has views which rarely are vague
If you cannot dance
There is ev-e-ry chance
You'll enjoy them as much as the plague.

fern3 · 30-10-2007, 21:07

There once was a cameraman called Mick
Who enjoyed his Saturday trick
He twizzled and twirled
He whizzed and he whirled
And made all the audience sick

fern3 · 30-10-2007, 23:36

They hired four experts to judge

fern3 · 30-10-2007, 23:38

They hired four experts to judge
Though now it's turned into a fudge
We've grumbled and moaned
We've e-mailed and phoned
But sadly the Beeb just won't budge

CAMBER · 30-10-2007, 23:59

We know the results show's not live
Viewing figures have taken a dive
To improve the mood
They'll dance in the nude
Can't wait for the samba and jive!

Cat Balou · 31-10-2007, 00:21

Len and Craig have gone stark raving mad
They told the viewers that we have been bad
But we pay to vote
So they should take note
We get to choose who we like and we’re glad

winenroses · 31-10-2007, 14:00

I'm really enjoying this thread
And all of the limericks I've read
Let's hope that Kenny
Shows all for a tenny
From Bruno and team Judges Dread.

I'd love to see him shake his stuff
With his kilt barely skirting his duff
If this show's a 'farce'
Then let's have some **** and a*se
Craig and Marlene love a bit of old rough.*

*As a source close to this FM, Slurs 'r Us, revealed exclusively in the last split second.

26-10-2007, 21:07	#1
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	Strictly Limericks How about a limerick thread? I'll start off with Claudia. There's a quirky young lady called Claud Who on It Takes Two's highly scored. We loved her long fringed, With her lips paley tinged, But it seems with that look she's now bored. So she's now wearing 'Farrah' type flicks As her PFM shoes she high kicks While 'dancing 'with Len Who Masters her when She muddles her quick quick slow quicks. We love how she goes crashing on - In a good way - she cannot go wrong. Claud, you're soooo sweeeet You would be hard to beat You're a ten - we award you the gong. It's a start!

27-10-2007, 11:36	#2
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	I like to see Anton get cross And show us that he is the boss He may be 'ambidextri' (?) Who cares, he is sexy! But that would be poor Erin's loss.

27-10-2007, 14:25	#3
Cat Balou Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,481	Limerick writing is harder than I thought but here's my attempt! There once was a dancer called Kate Whose tango made the judges irate But her partner Anton Refused to be outdone And their samba was brilliantly great

27-10-2007, 14:59	#4
x_malibubabe Forum Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Shipley Services: Sky, BT Broadband & Phone, Freeview, Xbox 360 Elite Posts: 1,088	This is my lame attempt.... you're right, it is hard! One of the best is called Tish, Partner Darren's a bit of a dish, Looking good with a pout, The audience will shout: Lilia, you better watch out! & another... Little Welsh boy Gethin, Has looks that'll send you to Heaven, Camilla's so lucky, But forget the nooky, He's mine twenty-four-seven. 0=]

27-10-2007, 15:13	#5
Cat Balou Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,481	I'm getting into this now. The limericks may not be great but we're having a real laugh thinking them up! Each weekend I’m glued to my telly To watch dancing by pretty young Kelly She twists and she turns And how Brendan yearns But her love is an actor called Billy Ian Waite is a dancer with flair James Jordan has talent to spare Vincent is funny Matt C is a honey And Brendan's Paso has me gasping for air!

27-10-2007, 15:38	#6
Cat Balou Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,481	Last one for today, I promise! Kenny Logan is trying to win By showing his fans lots of skin The Beeb thinks it wrong And bought him a thong But I keep thinking about what might have been

28-10-2007, 11:53	#7
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	There's a rather strict lady Arlene Who those Hot Gossip days has long seen But she's still lewdly lusting At manly hips thrusting Is she Hot Hot or is she Has-been?

28-10-2007, 20:42	#9
littlemadangel Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Home! Services: ---- Posts: 2,476	There's a lovely, young man called Jones Whose looks leave the girls shivering to their bones With a sexy smile from his lips He shows off his hips But he still has to listen to the judges groans. (Its my first attempt)

28-10-2007, 21:02	#10
bean_of_sb Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: UK Posts: 2,686	There once was an actor called Matt, Who's first dance was particularly flat, but each week he's improving, his hips are now moving, and he's king of the floor every Sat Sat meaning Saturday!

28-10-2007, 21:05	#12
CAMBER Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Brent Cross! Services: address finder! Posts: 7,928	Great limericks everyone!

28-10-2007, 21:07	#13
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	cat balou, x_malibubabe, littlemadangel, bean_of_sb, keeeep Limericking. Great stuff, thanks for your contributions, and you're all my favourites.

28-10-2007, 21:12	#14
CAMBER Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Brent Cross! Services: address finder! Posts: 7,928	That Sottish young man called Ken Each night dreamed of getting a ten So he danced with his kilt Flying up to the hilt Showing why he's the best of the men!

28-10-2007, 23:23	#15
PeachUK Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Peach's Peachdom Posts: 5,533	There once was a Judge who gave ten But he never will ever again As Arlene has sworn That his guts will be torn If he ever rates Brendan again! It's pathetic I know.. but I'm still thinking (Love the others btw!)

29-10-2007, 13:55	#16
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	The judges were not looking happy Their faces as sour as a nappy Gaby and Penny! Who knew? Well not Kenny - Now they're all spinning round in a flappy!

29-10-2007, 14:27	#17
jive bunny Forum Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 3,265	The judges had given another tongue lash For dancing a samba like a car crash Anton and Kate Should've have met their fate But frustratingly rescued, making SCD a hash!!

29-10-2007, 15:47	#18
Nikie Forum Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Little place called ESSEX! Services: Only Freeview... Posts: 643	My attempts There once was a girl called Ola Who went round with a pink feather boa The judges made her cry Because her husband had to say bye That poor little girl called Ola There once was a judge called Arlene Who claimed to be the best we'd seen She'd scream and shout And make an awful pout Oh how could we forget Arlene

30-10-2007, 05:02	#19
Trumbles Forum Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 2,512	After Saturday's exit our Gabby Has reason to be more than crabby Ken should hide every knife Lest it be that his wife Should suddenly come over stabby (I like Gabby, in case this gives the wrong impression. I just like lazy rhymes even more.) One of the judges, named Craig Has views which rarely are vague If you cannot dance There is ev-e-ry chance You'll enjoy them as much as the plague.

30-10-2007, 21:07	#20
fern3 Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Lost Posts: 1,330	There once was a cameraman called Mick Who enjoyed his Saturday trick He twizzled and twirled He whizzed and he whirled And made all the audience sick

30-10-2007, 23:36	#21
fern3 Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Lost Posts: 1,330	They hired four experts to judge

30-10-2007, 23:38	#22
fern3 Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Lost Posts: 1,330	They hired four experts to judge Though now it's turned into a fudge We've grumbled and moaned We've e-mailed and phoned But sadly the Beeb just won't budge

30-10-2007, 23:59	#23
CAMBER Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Brent Cross! Services: address finder! Posts: 7,928	We know the results show's not live Viewing figures have taken a dive To improve the mood They'll dance in the nude Can't wait for the samba and jive!

31-10-2007, 00:21	#24
Cat Balou Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,481	Len and Craig have gone stark raving mad They told the viewers that we have been bad But we pay to vote So they should take note We get to choose who we like and we’re glad

31-10-2007, 14:00	#25
winenroses Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,985	I'm really enjoying this thread And all of the limericks I've read Let's hope that Kenny Shows all for a tenny From Bruno and team Judges Dread. I'd love to see him shake his stuff With his kilt barely skirting his duff If this show's a 'farce' Then let's have some **** and ase Craig and Marlene love a bit of old rough. *As a source close to this FM, Slurs 'r Us, revealed exclusively in the last split second.