Geraldine: 'The Winner's Song'

Anyone who stayed in to watch The X Factor on Saturday night probably thought it was beyond parody. With Dannii Minogue's eggshell forehead, a generous helping of budget pyrotechnics and the painfully earnest performances from chubby middle-aged men and ex-cons, it's hard to take the show entirely seriously. So it's to Peter Kay's credit that he actually managed to tap the format for comic potential and come up with something funnier than the source material.

Geraldine McQueen - formerly known as Gerald - was the victor on Kay's Britain's Got The Pop Factor... spoof on Sunday. Geraldine bears more than a passing resemblance to Pop Idol flop Michelle McManus, and her 'Winner's Song' is an exquisite pastiche of the regulation power ballads sung by previous pop contest winners. Penned by Kay and Gary Barlow, its ridiculous key change should keep us chuckling until the real thing comes along in December. Just one question: why isn't 'Free Nelson Mandela'/'Umbrella' a B-side?