Lady Gaga: 'Born This Way'

A lot's been said about Lady Gaga's cock - or lack thereof, if we're all completely honest with ourselves - but no one tends to talk about her balls. So here goes. It takes a whopping pair of love dumplings to trail your second album proper, the one that proves you're here to stay and all that, with a tune that channels the woman whose "Most Amazing Popstar On The Planet" crown you've just stolen.

And, for that matter, channels 'Express Yourself', one of the very best songs from Madonna's very best album. Tellingly, however, when Gaga goes all spoken wordy on the middle 8 here, you don't think 'Vogue', but rather the dead female icon rappy bit from 'Dance In The Dark', with whom 'Born This Way' shares a producer - Fernando Garibay - and the odd sonic embellishment. Of course, it's a much less macabre offering than their Monster hook-up, being a life-affirming equality anthem, a straight-up club pumper and a flat-out fantastic pop song that proves, however big Gaga's balls may be, they're never quite as big as her choruses.