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The Brit Awards is usually watchable because of the scraps, conflicts and brushes with controversy. Whether it be Oasis taunting Blur, Chumbawumba taking on John Prescott with a bucket of iced water, Jarvis launching a vigilante on Jacko, or Joss Stone making a proper boob of herself, it's the unpleasantness that keeps us tuning into the annual gong-fest.
But, here at The Sound, we've always preferred peace, love and harmony to disputes, drama and self-destruction. With this in mind, we've decided to pair up this year's biggest popstars for some rather unlikely duets. If the Brits can promise these five pairings, we might even forgive that Newton Faulkner nomination.
Kylie & Pete Doherty
Kylie's done her fair share of duets in the past. She let Justin Trousersnake rumba with her rear in 2003, and even managed to turn the drippy, dreary Leon Jackson into a viable popstar. Transforming Pete Doherty into an all-singing, all-dancing family entertainer would be the hardest challenge of all, but, if anyone can get him doing jazz-hands and grinning like a stage school darling, it's Miss Minogue.
Kaiser Chiefs & Adele
Ricky from the Kaisers has been bragging all week about how he's going to bed Kylie, so we thought it best to keep him well away from the Aussie pop minx. Instead, we fancy seeing everybody's tip-for-the-top Adele team up with the hyperactive Yorkshire guitar heroes for a rock 'n' roll initiation. The 'Ruby' rockers know a fair bit about handling hype and we want to know if Adele can match them for enthusiasm on those 'Woooooaahs' and 'Nah-nah-nah-nahs'.
Take That & Arctic Monkeys
Being the stereotypically grumpy Northern sods they are, the Arctic Monkeys don't care much for the waves of nostalgia created by '90s boyband/manband Take That. At the 2006 Q Awards, Alex Turner dubbed the Manchester four-piece "a load of b*******", but we reckon the Sheffield frontman was just bitter because his primary school crush had a thing for Mark Owen. If Take That can forgive, and the Monkeys can surrender their cool for three minutes, we'd love a rendition of 'Pray' with jerky guitars, Matt Helders whacking the drums and Howard/Jason doing some body-poppin' on the side.
Klaxons & Paul McCartney
Nu-rave scenesters Klaxons have promised us an absolutely "massive" duet at this year's ceremony. Unless they manage to bring John Lennon/Elvis Presley/Bob Marley back from the dead, the best we can hope for is a hook-up with the last remaining Beatle (who isn't Ringo). Let's hope they've organised a trance mash-up of 'The Frog Chorus', 'Eleanor Rigby' and 'Golden Skans', and Macca still has it in him to rock out with 'da kids'.
Mika & Amy Winehouse
Mika was the second-biggest success story of 2007, selling by the bucket-load and managing to keep himself sane in the process. Amy Winehouse was the biggest success story of 2007, selling by the bucket-load but failing to keep a grip on the whole sanity thing. Could Mika perk up the troubled soul diva with his squealing falsetto? Would Winehouse raise her game after her shaky end to 2007? What better way to test the car-crash potential than live on ITV1 on February 20.
Which duets would you like to see at this year's Brit Awards? Use the usual space to let us know.
But, here at The Sound, we've always preferred peace, love and harmony to disputes, drama and self-destruction. With this in mind, we've decided to pair up this year's biggest popstars for some rather unlikely duets. If the Brits can promise these five pairings, we might even forgive that Newton Faulkner nomination.
Kylie's done her fair share of duets in the past. She let Justin Trousersnake rumba with her rear in 2003, and even managed to turn the drippy, dreary Leon Jackson into a viable popstar. Transforming Pete Doherty into an all-singing, all-dancing family entertainer would be the hardest challenge of all, but, if anyone can get him doing jazz-hands and grinning like a stage school darling, it's Miss Minogue.
Kaiser Chiefs & Adele
Ricky from the Kaisers has been bragging all week about how he's going to bed Kylie, so we thought it best to keep him well away from the Aussie pop minx. Instead, we fancy seeing everybody's tip-for-the-top Adele team up with the hyperactive Yorkshire guitar heroes for a rock 'n' roll initiation. The 'Ruby' rockers know a fair bit about handling hype and we want to know if Adele can match them for enthusiasm on those 'Woooooaahs' and 'Nah-nah-nah-nahs'.
Being the stereotypically grumpy Northern sods they are, the Arctic Monkeys don't care much for the waves of nostalgia created by '90s boyband/manband Take That. At the 2006 Q Awards, Alex Turner dubbed the Manchester four-piece "a load of b*******", but we reckon the Sheffield frontman was just bitter because his primary school crush had a thing for Mark Owen. If Take That can forgive, and the Monkeys can surrender their cool for three minutes, we'd love a rendition of 'Pray' with jerky guitars, Matt Helders whacking the drums and Howard/Jason doing some body-poppin' on the side.
Klaxons & Paul McCartney
Nu-rave scenesters Klaxons have promised us an absolutely "massive" duet at this year's ceremony. Unless they manage to bring John Lennon/Elvis Presley/Bob Marley back from the dead, the best we can hope for is a hook-up with the last remaining Beatle (who isn't Ringo). Let's hope they've organised a trance mash-up of 'The Frog Chorus', 'Eleanor Rigby' and 'Golden Skans', and Macca still has it in him to rock out with 'da kids'.
Mika was the second-biggest success story of 2007, selling by the bucket-load and managing to keep himself sane in the process. Amy Winehouse was the biggest success story of 2007, selling by the bucket-load but failing to keep a grip on the whole sanity thing. Could Mika perk up the troubled soul diva with his squealing falsetto? Would Winehouse raise her game after her shaky end to 2007? What better way to test the car-crash potential than live on ITV1 on February 20.
Which duets would you like to see at this year's Brit Awards? Use the usual space to let us know.
More: Music, Brits 2008
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