Keating 'exhausted' after Gately's death

Ronan Keating has admitted that he is finding it hard to deal with the death of Stephen Gately.

In an interview with The Observer, Keating explained that he is considering having counselling to help him cope.

"I just feel worn out," he said. "I haven't slept. My brain doesn't work. My heart's broken. You just feel crushed. I've had good days and bad days."

Asked what the "bad days" are like, he said: "Horrible, you can't breathe, you feel like your chest is collapsing, the walls are coming in on top of you. Anxiety, I think is what they call it. I haven't been sleeping at all lately. It's been horrible. We've all been feeling the same way since Stephen died. Mentally, I'm absolutely exhausted."

He continued: "I've never before thought about going to get help with counsellors. For the first time ever I think I should... [When Stephen died] there was nothing, just this wall of devastation, shock.

"I don't think it has hit any of us properly. There's times when you feel like you can't breathe, you know, when you're panicking, and I'm not like that. I've always been on a level."

Keating added that he was in a restaurant when he heard the news that Gately had died.

"I bawled my eyes out," he said. "Screamed down the phone, 'What are you saying?' I couldn't take it in. When the guy on the phone said, 'Stephen's passed away', I said, 'Stephen who?' because I thought he was talking about someone else.

"I just didn't think it would be Steo. I'll never f**king forget it. I ran out of the restaurant, my sister ran after me with my coat [saying], 'What's wrong? What's wrong?' I told her. And then I had to call the three guys [from Boyzone]. Bloody hell, what a call. Horrendous. The most horrendous hour of my life. Horrific."

Keating also admitted that he has questioned his Catholic faith since Gately's death.

"I didn't understand," he said. "I don't understand. I'm angry. I'm upset. Stephen's with me, he's protecting us, I speak to him before I sing, before I go on stage. He's with me. I'm a believer. It's just hard, that's all. It's hard to come to terms with."