Showbiz
It's truly the end of an era. After five months of bitching, sniping and more jibing than an episode of Question Time, the celebrity feud of the year is over. Lily Allen has apologised to Cheryl Cole, and the Girls Aloud belter has accepted, promising never to laugh when someone calls Lil a "chick with a dick" again. Aaagh! Whose ceaseless succession of catty comments, bitchy digs and pitiless put-downs is going to entertain us now? Well, worry not, for a replacement slanging match is already brewing. Mrs. Cole has recently sunk her claws into nineties popstar Betty Boo, calling her - with characteristic wit, insight and verbal dexterity - "s**t". Betty, the ball's in your court.
10. Same Difference
The brother/sister combo are channelling High School Musical for their X Factor performance this Saturday. Our Sky+ is already set.
9. Paris Hilton
The celebrity heiress is absolutely desperate to be cryogenically frozen. Paris, love, let's make it sooner rather than later, eh?
8. Jodie Marsh
The Essex chest-flasher tells us what we've known all along: her MTV show Who'll Take Her Up The Aisle? was "vile".
7. Kelly Brook
The Strictly star launches her own perfume. Fingers crossed it's not based on the last three scents to have penetrated her nostrils: industrial-strength fake tan, blister plasters and - yuck! - Brendan Cole's sweat.
6. Kate Garraway
The GMTV grin-flasher deals with the crushing realisation that bad things happen when you forget to pay your road tax.
5. Brad Pitt
Angelina's loin-teaser was a stripper in his college days, apparently. Let the hunt for video tape commence!
4. Jennifer Aniston
The Friends star likes her unmentionables to be smoother than a Tom Jones chat-up line, so we've heard.
3. Terry Wogan
For once, the packet that's causing Auntie a headache has nothing to do with her monthly pay-roll.
2. Spice Girls
Every little helps, it seems, when you've got a reunion tour to promote.
1. Cheryl Cole
Something tells us that saucer isn't going to stay milk-free for very long. But, then again, would we want it to?
The brother/sister combo are channelling High School Musical for their X Factor performance this Saturday. Our Sky+ is already set.
9. Paris Hilton
The celebrity heiress is absolutely desperate to be cryogenically frozen. Paris, love, let's make it sooner rather than later, eh?
The Essex chest-flasher tells us what we've known all along: her MTV show Who'll Take Her Up The Aisle? was "vile".
7. Kelly Brook
The Strictly star launches her own perfume. Fingers crossed it's not based on the last three scents to have penetrated her nostrils: industrial-strength fake tan, blister plasters and - yuck! - Brendan Cole's sweat.
The GMTV grin-flasher deals with the crushing realisation that bad things happen when you forget to pay your road tax.
5. Brad Pitt
Angelina's loin-teaser was a stripper in his college days, apparently. Let the hunt for video tape commence!
The Friends star likes her unmentionables to be smoother than a Tom Jones chat-up line, so we've heard.
3. Terry Wogan
For once, the packet that's causing Auntie a headache has nothing to do with her monthly pay-roll.
Every little helps, it seems, when you've got a reunion tour to promote.
1. Cheryl Cole
Something tells us that saucer isn't going to stay milk-free for very long. But, then again, would we want it to?
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