How many candles? The River Cottage foodie turns 43 today.
DS' birthday present: Hugh must getting tired of all that organic grub on the quiet, so we sent him a sticky chocolate cake packed with monosodium glutamate and other tasty additives. You know you can't resist, Hugh!
How many candles? The party-loving supermodel is 34 on Wednesday.
DS' birthday present: Kate doesn't want any more texts from that pesky Pete Doherty causing problems with her man, so we've bought her a shiny new mobile phone. Just be more careful who you give out your number to this time, missy!
How many candles? The Ordinary Boy celebrates his 26th birthday on Wednesday.
DS' birthday present: Since things didn't go exactly to plan with either his wife or career, we've wangled Preston a return spot on next year's Celebrity Big Brother. Hopefully he can make a better go of it this time around.
How many candles? The TV legend turns 51 on Thursday.
DS' birthday present: Keith told us he's hankering after an acting role as a moody Scotsman, so we nabbed him an audition for a biopic of Gordon Brown. Break a leg, Cheggers!
How many candles? The singer warbles into his 29th year on Sunday.
DS' birthday present: What's this we hear about Will spurning his fans? Tsk tsk. We thought Mr Young could do with a reminder of his modest roots so we've sent him a DVD of Pop Idol to show him where it all began.