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Jahmene: 'My mother's screams will stick with me until the day I die'

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Jahmene Douglas has opened up about the domestic violence which tortured his family - and said that his mother's screams will stick with him forever.

The X Factor singer, who is supporting Cosmopolitan's 'Real Man' campaign with Women's Aid, told them: "The sad thing about an abusive childhood is that you cut it out. My memories come and go, some are good, but most are bad.

The X Factor Week 7: Jahmene.

© Ken McKay/Thames/Rex Features



"The one thing that will stick with me until the day I die is my mother's screams.

"Hearing her scream for her life but being paralysed with fear, unable to move one muscle. We were under such an evil lockdown of control that you wouldn't dare move in case one action resulted in something much worse.

"Nightmares upon nightmares build up from nights of those screams. It's one of those things that can't be fully described to the extremity of what it exactly is...

The X Factor Week 6: Jahmene

© Ken McKay/Thames/Rex Features



"You have to feel it to know it and to know what needs to be changed to help others. Domestic violence is in my DNA, it's in who I am. I'd rather be beaten myself than ever hear those screams again."

The star, who admitted he once tried to take his own life, said: "My mother is a saint. She would go to hell and back to watch over her children to know that they are okay.

The X Factor: Nicole and Jahmene

© Ken McKay/Thames/Rex Features



"I honestly believe I would not have survived to be here today if it was not for my mother.

"Now she is raising money and awareness for domestic violence refuges through Women's Aid who need a lot more support, funding and protection... I just want to help too.

"She's an absolute source of unconditional love and never-ending strength."

The X Factor week four: Jahmene

© Rex Features / Ken McKay/Thames



Campaigning for the cause, he said: "It makes me sick the government doesn't seem to understand. Budget cuts will mean some refuges and domestic violence services will have to close.

"There is such little help out there as it is – the people at Women's Aid are amazing but they need the resources. Women, children and men suffer on a daily basis.

"This is not something that happens once in a blue moon. It's sad the system doesn't understand it."

Jahmene and Nicole Scherzinger

© THAMES TV/SYCO



Feeling stronger than ever, he said: "The fear can leave you. I was living in fear for years after and it was just as bad as having him around.

"It flips your whole life upside down and steals your focus from life.

"I've been lucky to have grown from that stage now. The fear does leave but only if you help yourself.

The X Factor Live Show 1: Jahmene Douglas

© Ken McKay/Thames/Rex Features



"You have the choice to click self-destruct and live in depression or you can switch it around into rebuilding what was stolen from you.

"All it takes is time and enthusiasm... Paint your negative into a positive picture."

Read Jahmene's full interview at cosmopolitan.co.uk and support Jahmene's mum's charity here.

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