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Drinking Games: 'The Apprentice'

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Drinking Games: 'The Apprentice'
Is a night in with Margaret Mountford, Nick Hewer and a couple of bottles of red your idea of a dream evening? If your answer's yes, then DS may just be able to help. We can't supply the booze, but we can offer an Apprentice drinking game that will bring some much-needed cheer to the Amstrad boss's boardroom on Wednesday evenings. Just try to avoid getting too tipsy and answering back to Sir Alan - he really doesn't like that!

1. For each dramatic Margaret Mountford eye-roll or glare of disdain, down a shot.

2. Have another shot each time Nick Hewer winces/sucks extra hard on a bitter lemon/screws his eyes up in horror.

3. Down a pint any time a candidate says one of the following in the boardroom: "You haven't seen the best of me yet", "I gave 110% on that task", "I'm here to learn and can be moulded by you, Sir Alan".

4. If Ben Clarke mentions his scholarship to Sandhurst or utters the words "just let me finish!", crack into the vodka.

5. Each time Sir Alan cracks an amazing one liner in the boardroom ("Someone may be in need of that commode by the time I'm finished", "I know the words to 'Candle In The Wind', don't make me Elton John", "I'm harder to play than a Stradivarius"), polish off a double and mixer.

6. Each time the camera gives us a lingering shot of Debra Barr's icey stare or James McQuillan's gormless gape, have three fingers of beer.

7. Each time Lorraine Tighe tells her team that she has "a funny feeling", down a shot.

8. Have a second shot when everyone else ignores her.

9. Any time Sir Alan's East London upbringing, the "six-figure salary" or "Sir Alan's business empire" are mentioned, help yourself to a glass of red wine.

10. Down all your remaining drinks when Sir Alan Sugar chooses to fire a quiet, polite person that you would love to work alongside and saves a gobby, arrogant twerp who barks inane, offensive babble every two seconds.

This feature is intended to entertain only. Digital Spy does not advocate binge drinking.

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