The Axeman Cometh

Counted out

I remember when ITV used to start Sunday viewing with a church service. Now, we’re going to get a C-list celeb trying to rip Kate Lawler’s clothes off in a wrestling ring.

Who says TV is dumbing down?

There were two significant axings from ITV this week. Firstly, we had the demise of Celebrity Wrestling from its primetime slot. Now that the show is to be aired opposite Breakfast with Frost, no doubt Sir David's ratings will benefit. I honestly think reruns of Cheggers Plays Pop would fare better than this pile of rubbish.

Unplatted

The other major culling was over on Coronation Street where doleful Martin Platt, the male nurse with the penchant for girls of school leaving age, is to be given the old heave-ho.

It’s a shame that Sean Wilson has been saddled with the tragic romance storylines over the years as I’ve always thought his forte lay in light comedy. Some of Corrie’s brightest and best moments lie in this area and it’s a shame they couldn’t have let him drift in those storylines and away from the melodrama.

As for the future, I hope his future lies in comedy drama and that he doesn't end up as the angling correspondent on some obscure sports channel.

Bradford – Twenty Years On

I find it odd that an event that had such a major impact on the British way of life, the Bradford Fire Disaster, has not been commemorated in any significant way on national television.

It’s been left to the newspapers (The Times were very thorough) and the marvellous Radio 5 Live to take a look at the tragedy, remember the victims and pay tribute to the bravery of the people caught in the shocking events of the day.

It’s important that we never forget the lessons learned on that shocking day and television should be playing a part in that.

All the more irritating in that climate that so much airtime has been given to Manchester United fans whinging over Malcolm Glazier’s takeover.

Back to the Future

The BBC has long since had a place to put old actors out to pasture. That has been the comfy old world of Last of the Summer Wine. It now seems that on their way to the last stop before theatrical heaven, yesterday’s stars have another place to stop, New Tricks.

In their day, the stars of this were the bit hitters in TV drama. None came much bigger than Dennis “sing the feem toon??? Waterman, while big audiences were always a feature of James “When the Boat Comes In??? Bolam’s career. Alun Armstrong meanwhile always used to solicit cries of "oh I like him, what’s he been in??? from older members of the audience.

In this piece these three old stagers are kept in check by Amanda Redman in a performance more Diana Dors-like than the one she gave as Diana Dors a few years back. If it wasn’t enough that the regulars provide more nostalgia than a night watching UKTV Gold, the guest stars add to that ambience.

Anita Dobson gave an entertaining little cameo as an ex-hooker while Keith Barron popped up as a copper who may or not have been dodgy while Jenny Agutter’s appearance as a widow with a guilty secret would have left many male members of the audience pining for the days when she seemed incapable of appearing on screen without whipping her top off for no apparent reason.

All in all it’s pretty inconsequential stuff but it’s easy to watch and ideally scheduled on Monday nights.

Laugh? Goodness Gracious No

Perhaps it’s a gender thing (my girlfriend loved this) but I was bored stiff through most of Life Isn’t All Ha Ha Hee Hee. This surprised me as I had thoroughly enjoyed Meera Syal’s Anita and Me and was expecting to find this as compelling. It seemed to take ages to get going.

Certainly any fans of The Kumars expecting a laugh a minute would have been disappointed.

It was only in the last few minutes as Tania (Laila Rouass) betrayed her friends' confidences and hence plunged all the relationships into crisis that I began to feel engaged.

Someone tagged this Desperate Housewives in Saris but I think it’s probably better than that. Certainly the ending of episode one (and the fact that my better half will grab the remote) will keep me watching next week.

Just Say No to reunion shows

I love these reunion shows. After They Were Famous has often had some fascinating tales to tell about the stars of yesteryear and a Fame reunion on the BBC a few years back was particularly poignant.

It's such a shame that Bring Back Grange Hill was an chance missed and seemed more about bigging up the ego and media profile of the consistently irritating Justin Lee Collins than providing us with any insight into what had happened to those old pupils of Britain’s most infamous TV school.

It had all started so well with Lee MacDonald (Zammo) being tracked down and been given a decent interview about his career and what had happened to him since. After that all we got was JLC and his camera crew looking around London for other members of the cast.

It was an opportunity wasted. We never even got to see an interview with the guy that played top bully Gripper Stebson and the zenith, with the reunited cast getting to sing Just Say No again was a total mess.

The best bit was the film insert from former cast member Mmoloki Christie who finally gave credence to those rumours about what some of the cast were smoking on their anti-drugs tour of the states.

Rich lives, empty pockets

Skint drew to a close on BBC One this week and if you missed it due its late night slots, keep your eyes peeled for repeats. It was cracking stuff.

One of the many bitter sweet moments was Bob the Busker, his dreams of making it big on the car boot sales having fallen apart, reluctantly waving good bye to his long whiskers in an attempt to blend in better with society.

The point is that those featured may have money troubles but our society is richer for having people was such warmth and depth of character.

Too darned hot…oh and too darned long

Drama documentary Heatwave would probably have been a good idea at half the length but at ninety minutes it was full of padding and bordering on the monotonous.

The premise was good, a fictional account of how England would cope in the event of Heatwave. However there seemed to be few hard facts shown to back up the scare mongering and it wasn’t nearly as well done as similar drama-docs like The Day Britain Stoped or The Man Who Broke Britain.

If they’d used real experts instead of actors to describe events it may have had more gravity.