A bad Madonna lookalike, a dancing leprechaun and some posho students covering Dizzee Rascal on violins are among the treats in store for you on tonight's BGT. But who will be joining Connected, Tobias Mead, Chandi and Spelbound in Saturday's grand final? Stick with Reality Bites all night as we bring you live updates and our own buzzer verdict on the eight acts.
22:04: That's all for tonight folks! I'll be back at 7.30pm tomorrow night for more of the same. Expect more pizza adverts, dancers and nonsense from Piers Morgan. I can't wait! Remember to drop me your tweets on the show @dsrealitybites.
22:00: Dec is caught out by the comments from Peridot and gets all defensive with them, telling them to look on the bright side. I'm liking this sparky finale a lot. It might not prove to be a sensible move from Peridot taking on the BGT machine, but they deserve respect for leaving with a bang.
21:59: Ooh-er. The live shows just stepped up a notch. A touch of dissent from Peridot, which is good to see - some fighting spirit. A well-reasoned and articulate argument from the guys as they point out that it was unfair of the judges to compare them to acts from previous years. A fair point, I think, as Piers and Amanda were not comparing Christopher's voice to Paul Potts, or Chloe's performance to Holly Steel.
21:53: No surprises from the judges. Piers and Amanda vote Christopher through to the next round. Tough luck for Peridot. Piers 'dance expert' Morgan had it in for them, which is a shame.
21:51: Facing the judges' vote are... PERIDOT and CHRISTOPHER STONE. Tough luck for Chloe and The Arrangement. I imagine the voting percentages were tight.
21:49: First act through is... PAUL BURLING! You guys called it. I may not be a fan, but he's definitely won over the public. He must be a real contender to win the whole thing now.
21:48: Enough of my waffling. It's decision time! Lights down, serious faces everyone.
21:46: I know a lot of you guys disagree with me about Paul Burling, but can we all agree that Jimmy Forde and Phillip Grimmer shouldn't be on the show? When they show clips of Phillip at his home, wobbling around, it makes me uneasy. I'm fairly certain he is not in on the joke.
21:39: Pixie Lott has just sung a song. No, I'm not interested either. She likes Paul Burling and Chloe Hickinbottom. PHONE LINES ARE NOW CLOSED. Stop hammering those mobiles people, you are wasting your pennies.
21:34: We're back on guys. We get a quick recap of all the acts. The judges claim that this is the best lineup of the series so far. I'm not sure if I agree with that, but I concur with the assessment that the result is too close to call. Judging from all your comments and the Twitter-talk, Paul Burling should be the outright winner. However, who joins him in the final is anyone's guess. Could be any one of Peridot, Chris Stone, The Arrangement or Chloe.
21:26: After some strong opinions from you guys, I feel I should defend my comments on Paul Burling. I'm clearly in the minority in not enjoying his act, but I think it would be wrong of me to change my mind to just fit in. However, I must point out that I think Paul seems like a wonderful guy and if it was down to hard work, he would get my vote for the final. After watching the performance back, I must also applaud him for using the TV burp set-up. It was a clever way getting comedy across to a mass audience in two minutes, which is a tricky business (see Kev Orkian yesterday!).
Join us back here at 9.30pm when the results show starts on ITV1.
20:56: I don't know about you guys, but I need a lie down after all that nonsense. I love BGT, but the judges really took the biscuit this evening. I've never cared for Piers Morgan's opinion, but he was speaking utter tripe this evening. If I had my way, Christopher Stone, Peridot and The Arrangement would be in the top three. I fear I could be let down massively by the public vote. If you want to chat to us about the show, or disagree with me, then feel free to drop us a Tweet on @dsrealitybites.
20:51: I know that it wasn't mind-blowing. I know it wasn't as good as their audition. I know that routine needed a bit of work. But Jesus, someone call me a doctor. How can Piers and Amanda, who raved about the distinctly average Paul Burling, sit there and pick holes in Peridot? When was Piers Morgan designated the street dance expert. "There wasn't enough dancing guys." I don't even know where to begin picking apart Piers's sheer idiocy with that remark.
20:49: It's not quite as good as their audition, but that's still a pretty good performance from Peridot. Plenty of spins, interesting choreography and they have a unique style of street dance.
20:42: The last act on tonight's BGT are street dance act Peridot. Their audition blew me away and with the best draw (the last act on is usually a good bet for the final), they stand a real chance of going through this evening. To use a Cowell/Piers/Amanda cliche - they could be dark horses.
20:37: Finally, some sanity. It's Christopher Stone time. He's singing 'The Impossible Dream'. He's rather good. He may be an accountant, he may be a bit funny-looking, but he can't half belt out a decent big note. OK, he's no SuBo, but after some of tonight's drivel, he's shining like a superstar. It's also nice to see that the nervy mummy's boy from the auditions has grown some balls and is now sounding like a man.
20:31: Are we the only people a little bit concerned about Jimmy? Louis Walsh, who is in the audience this evening, Ant & Dec and Piers appear more than happy to drag this out for as long as possible. Jimmy, dressed in a green suit lest we forget, is still barking on about his pot of gold. Louis just compared Jimmy to Michael Flatley. I think I need a stiff drink quickly.
20:25: Did you think the show couldn't get any more silly after Phillip Grimmer? Well, you were wrong. Here's Louis Walsh's pick for the win - Jimmy Forde. The Irish dancing leprechaun. He's yet another old man, who shouldn't be put through this live TV torture. But here he is anyway, chanting about his pot of gold and dancing a merry jig. This isn't car-crash telly. It's a jumbo-jet crash.
20:20: The Arrangement mash up Cheryl Cole, SuBo, JLS and plenty more. Jono the frontman gives it his full effort and plenty of his unique pizazz. Call me a cheap date and easily swung, but I really like that. Full of beans, energy and surprises, that was my highlight of the evening so far. Simon Cowell says that they are like Marmite. Do you know what I think Simon? I think you need some new metaphors.
20:17: Right, I've just about recovered from the shock of discovering that Simon Cowell thinks that I'm a snob. Next up is The Arrangement. Peter Crouch is taking a break from World Cup duties to sing with his college buddies. I liked these guys a lot when I interviewed them earlier this year. Very down-to-earth and funny.
20:12: Do you ever get the feeling that you are watching a totally different show to everyone else? Paul Burling gives a workman-like performance, redoing his Harry Hill impression and giving us a distinctly average David Dickinson, Simon Cowell and an appalling Alan Carr. But why no buzzer? Apparently the judges love him! Piers says that it would be a "travesty" if he didn't make the final. Simon Cowell claims that he is the "fish and chips" of entertainment and that TV people are too snobby about his sort of humour. Well, slap me sideways. Apparently I'm a snob!
20:11: Up next is Paul Burling, and I have an admission to make. I do not like impressionists. I don't think it is funny to merely sound like another person. He's going to have to work hard to impress me.
20:06: Thankfully Phillip is put out of his misery and sent off stage, after some rather mean ribbing and a prolonged judging segment. It was all a bit distasteful. Simon asks the audience to send him through to the final for further humiliation.
20:00: 57-year-old Phillip Grimmer is dancing around the stage in a purple leotard and a wig. Who says that the show is lacking in quality this year? Pfft, we won't hear of it.
19:57: Next act up... Phillip Grimmer. Ofcom get your staff manning the phones. I'd expect some phonecalls about the mental health of BGT contestants tomorrow morning. Poor bloke.
19:55: Time for another ad break. You know that you love them really.
19:53: The judges all rave about Chloe, although Simon questions whether she could have a recording career. Piers Morgan gets all smug and slimy, claiming that Chloe is a two-finger salute to the show's critics. Let's see if you are so proud of the show when Phillip Grimmer performs Piers!
19:48: Chloe sings 'Moonriver'. It's not that great. But she hits the final notes and doesn't let herself or anyone else down. She's got great composure and an intriguing voice for a young girl. I'm not sure if the circus of BGT is the best place for her though.
19:46: After one of those pesky advert breaks (there does appear to be quite a lot of them this year doesn't there?), it's time for 10-year-old Vera Lynn enthusiast Chloe Hickinbottom. Apparently she wants to be a singer "more than anything in the world".
19:39: They are all dressed in bright multi-colour outfits. The music is Katrina And The Waves' 'Walking On Sunshine'. It's like going back in time to a New Faces episode in 1976. Lots of teeth, grins and jazz hands. All sweet, cuddly and no buzzes from the judges. But absolutely no chance of making the top two.
19:36: First act up in the dreaded opening slot are tiddywink dance collective Starburst. They want to spend the £100,000 on new toilets at their training centre. At least it's different. We'll refrain from making gags about there being plenty of poop on this show.
19:33: Ant and Dec introduce the judges. Amanda appears to have come dressed as the purple Quality Street. "Look at the shoes," coos Dec. Well it's probably best we don't look at the dress.
19:32: Phillip Grimmer has promised that he's going to be better than Madonna. Sigh. No you're not Phillip.
19:30: It's day three of the semi-finals. Are you flagging yet? You'd better not be, because there are two hours of BGT to battle through tonight.