After a long sleep and some serious contemplation about the glory days and golden era of the Jungle Cats, everything in Big Brother 2 and 3, Ben Duncan's hair, Science, Spiral's rap and the Aisleyne vs Nikki forum wars, we stand by the claim. Last night's Big Brother on Channel 5 wasn't just the best episode since it moved from Channel 4, it was one of the finest in the show's history.
It all started fairly innocuously with Frankie Cocozza dressed as a bee and failing to spell 'pansy'. But a load of beer and one burst of 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' later and the whole episode exploded into a flurry of legal threats, tears, screams and one of the greatest Big Brother quotes of all time courtesy of women's rights activist Nicola McLean.
For 30 minutes, Channel 5 had unmissable television.
Denise Welch prowling the house, bleary-eyed, glugging from a bottle of beer, all wild hair and smudged eyeliner.
A haggard Nicola McLean screeching for her freedom, hurling herself to the floor and proclaiming herself a "secret feminist" who can't possibly bear another second in the same house with Mad Hatter Welch. "We're not whores!" screamed McLean, Nuts magazine's Face of Feminism 2012.
Frankie Cocozza, who has spent the majority of his time on the show trying to keep his genitals in his pants and gurning to the cameras about how much he loves girls (phwoar!) and sex (getinthere!) and stuff (more phwoar!), suddenly looks like the voice of reason, calmly adjusting his shaggy moptop and watching the madness ensue from the sofas.
Poor old Romeo Dunn sat on a garden bench with his head in his hands, wondering why he opted for Celebrity Big Brother rather than a So Solid Crew reunion.
Meanwhile, the bloke from Free Willy is curled up in the corner somewhere smoking a fag and wondering how it all came to this.
It might not have matched the infamous Big Brother 5 'Fight Night' (but then what can), but last night's episode was about as gripping and thrilling as Big Brother gets. After three weeks together, the celebrities are not just frayed at the edges, they're beaten, ripped and shredded to bits.
Too often Celebrity Big Brother suffers from the fact that it doesn't run for long enough. A normal non-Celeb series usually only warms up around the fourth to fifth week when the boredom creeps in and the cracks in the relationships over 'who ate all the cornflakes' evolve into giant craters of 'I want to stab her eyes out' hatred.
The fact that Nicola and Denise have clearly been covering up resentment and smothering their internal desire to bicker and rip each other's hair out for the past fortnight, the twins' open admission about "playing the game" and desire to win, everything to do with Michael Madsen, the cheeky grin on the sidelines from Cocozza, all combined to make for platinum standard Big Brother.
Do you agree with our verdict on Pantsgate? Where do you think the episode ranked in the best Big Brother episodes of all time? Share your views below!
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