Cult Spy: Phobia Corner #6: Sex!
The Phobia: Sex
The Cause: Angel, The Outer Limits, Torchwood and The X-Files.
Shaggers of the world – unite and take cover! For if you become too hooked on the latest happenings in certain television shows you may well develop a fear of the old hanky panky. A quick poke of the fire is a one way ticket to incineration in the world of cult.
Most recently, hark back to Harkness for an example of why blokes might be wishing they were eunuchs. For the Torchwood crew, in the second episode 'Day One', had to contend with the rampant oestrogen of an alien-possessed female as she tried to screw her way through Cardiff.
Alien gas from a meteor that landed in Cardiff had seeped into the body of a disillusioned young woman and its life could only be sustained by shagging and grabbing the power from the other participant during the moment of, erm, truth.
Storming into a club, the horny lass grabs hold of a random bloke and drags him into the toilets for a bit of the old in-out in-out. Classy. But just as the jubilant lad was reaching the critical point, he dissolved into a pile of dust with his energy sucked dry. Poor guy. He’d have been better off staying at home with a copy of Big Jugs and some baby oil.
Similarly, a few years earlier in the second ever episode of Angel – ‘Lonely Hearts’ – nightclubs were also the hunting ground for nookie-needing beasts. A body-hopping demon used the haunt as the means of picking up new flesh to inhabit, but could only transfer itself during the sacred act of coitus. The corpses that were left behind presumably had smiles on their faces. What a way to go.
The whole alien body-snatching leading to snatch-fearing is perhaps best witnessed in a 1995 episode of The Outer Limits starring a pre-Charmed Alyssa Milano as the beastly bump 'n' grinder. 'Caught in the Act' followed Milano as a perfectly nice young lady called Hannah who comes into contact with an alien object that takes possession of her body. However, it needs the flesh of others to sustain itself and that's made a ot easier by shedding those clothes.
In one memorable scene, Milano's character disrobes and her young male conquest follows suit. As the pair entwine, the guy’s flesh starts to be absorbed into her body courtesy of some nifty CGI work. Presumably before he even has time to make it to half-mast, he’s already vanished. Don’t feel too much sympathy though – plenty of chaps would trade their life for a few seconds of nudity with Milano.
As if your collective hormones haven't already evaporated, an episode of The X-Files in 1994 saw Mulder and Scully investigate several deaths that occurred during the throes of passion. Entitled 'Genderbender', the story featured a creepy being that had the ability to change sex at will, rather like a homicidal Pete Burns. Packed full of pheromones that made him/her/it irresistable to others, this beast left a trail of both male and female bodies behind on their beds.
With all these similar plotlines in cult shows equating sex to a rather gory death, perhaps they should be shown more often on primetime television. What could be a more unique way of countering the rise in population across the globe?