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'Dancing with the Stars: All-Stars': First results recap

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Never accuse Dancing with the Stars: All-Stars of being understated - we're being served up a two-hour results show to find out who's the first celeb to be sent home! But since the standard is so high, it's going to be tough to say goodbye, even in the first week.

Dancing With The Stars S15E01: Emmitt Smith and Cheryl Burke

© WENN / ABC



All the dancers performed a cha cha cha or a foxtrot in Monday's premiere, with Emmitt and Cheryl coming off best with a score of 24.5. Less happy are Pamela and Tristan, who managed to scrape just 17 points from the judges. Just as a refresher, here's how the leaderboard looks:
  1. Emmitt & Cheryl - 24.5
  2. Gilles & Peta - 24
  3. Sabrina & Louis - 22.5
  4. Shawn & Derek - 22
  5. Apolo & Karina - 22
  6. Helio & Chelsie - 21.5
  7. Melissa & Tony - 21
  8. Joey & Kym - 20.5
  9. Bristol & Mark - 19.5
  10. Kirstie & Maks - 19
  11. Pamela & Tristan - 17
But before we get the results, we're going to get a chance to find out just why the all-stars chose to put them through this whole thing again (after a couple of comments from Nick Lachey and a certain Sarah Palin, that is...)

Bristol Palin

Bristol says she "took a lot of heat" for making it to the final in her first season, but she insists she deserves to be here - she works as hard as everyone else! She's hoping she'll be more confident this time, and Tom thinks she was - certainly, her hips were! Tom, honestly. But Bristol reveals that though Mark's teaching method can be a bit embarrassing, it helps her get out of her shell. Cue a video of Mark urging her to shake her booty and "give her ass its own brain". "You have a kid and you never flirt? That's the biggest pile of crap I've ever heard," he adds. Ouch!

Dancing with the Stars 2012: Bristol Palin

© ABC



Kelly Monaco

Kelly admits that though she won season one, she doesn't know what she's doing - after all, it's been seven years since she danced. But she does say there's a "certain fire" involved with being on the show - and she felt it last night, too. Then it's time for a fun video - apparently Val is unaware of General Hospital. "I'm, like, half your age," he says in explanation, charmingly. "Ever heard of Google?" Tom asks, but Val insists he was "just flirting". Yikes, let's move on - Val says it's a "privilege" to be paired with Kelly, before comparing her to a "vintage car". "When you're in the hole stop digging," Tom sighs, speaking for the world.

Dancing with the Stars 2012: Kelly Monaco

© ABC



Pamela Anderson

Pamela came back because she loves performing, admitting that dance is more than just doing the steps correctly - it's the subtleties and rhythm that she wants to get right. She admits that she's desperate to get into next week so that she can perform a "little tease" in her attempt to end up on Broadway. As for the premiere performance - which got the lowest score - she admits that she's been travelling a lot and needs to put more work in (though she says it was "very emotional".) As for Tristan, he just wants to make sure that Pamela is happy. Bless.

Dancing With The Stars S15E01: Tristan MacManus and Pamela Anderson

© WENN / ABC



Joey Fatone

Joey says he wants to win, since he came second in his first season ("I would love to get the mirror ball trophy, look at Apolo, and go ner ner de ner ner". What a grown up!) But he does admit he was nervous about the premiere: "I didn't know whether to vomit or to relieve myself." "Speaking on the behalf of the janitorial staff, thanks for not going with those options," Tom zings. But time for a fun video, as we see Joey and Kym steal a picture of themselves to put in their dance studio (and hide one of the judges, too. Yikes.) Anyway, Kym says they have a "great connection" and she's pleased to be back with Joey - they're going to bring the fun ("and technique", Joey chips in.)

Dancing With The Stars S15E01: Kym Johnson and Joey Fatone

© WENN / ABC



Drew Lachey

Drew explains that he thought the show was a lot of fun the first time around, so that's why he's back (and to become a better performer). He reveals that a lot has changed since his first time on the show - "I'm almost as old as you now," he tells Tom. For her part, Anna admits that she never really watched Drew's performances from his first season, though she's picked up on things watching them back now. "As long as I keep saying, 'Yes, ma'am, okay, sure', I think it's going to be fantastic," Drew jokes.

Dancing With The Stars S15E01: Drew Lachey and Anna Trebunskaya

© WENN / ABC



Apolo Anton Ohno

Apolo says he loves competition - he is an Olympic athlete, after all. He's determined to bring "that same mentality", and he "obviously" wants to win another mirror ball trophy! But when Tom suggests he's the contestant taking this most seriously, Karina shakes her head - apparently he's "very funny"! Apolo does say that no-one wants second place, though, so you know. But Tom wants to know whether his (interesting) suspenders are the reason Apolo is in the middle of the pack! Basically, Apolo says no and talks about how he can improve and is having fun. So that's nice. "That's what I told him to say," Karina reveals.

Dancing with the stars 2012: Apolo Ohno

© ABC



Hélio Castroneves

Hélio says one of the reasons he came back was so that his daughter could see him dance - though he also thinks it's "a lot of fun" and he likes being pushed to his limits. Tom wants to know if he considered quitting after getting a standing ovation before he'd even danced but Hélio just talks about how exciting it was. But why talk to Hélio when we can embarrass poor Chelsie with a video, in which she admits not knowing that Brazilians speak Portuguese and expressing surprise when Hélio says South Americans speak Spanish. Afterwards she explains that it was just a "brain lapse" and that she thought Hélio was saying North America spoke Spanish. This makes no sense, but Chelsie's so embarrassed that let's just move on.

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Chelsie Hightower and Helio Castroneves

© WENN / ABC



Melissa Rycroft

Melissa describes her first time on the how as one of the best experiences of her life, but she's in a different place now - married with a child - and she wants to prove she can still do it! Plus, surprise surprise, she wants to win the trophy. Tom takes the opportunity to point out how great Melissa looks, while Tony says Melissa has a new "perspective" now. And he says again that he feels like he let her down before - aww! Still, he totally humblebrags by saying: "The most insecure people in the world are world champions. I happen to be one." Niiice, Tony.

Dancing with the Stars 2012: Melissa Rycroft

© ABC



Gilles Marini

Gilles is another one to say he wants to win the trophy (what a surprise) but he says that he thinks this time will be even harder. After Tom gives him the chance to namecheck his roles in Brothers & Sisters and Switched At Birth, there's a fun little video of Gilles repeatedly saying he's not a dancer...

Dancing With The Stars S15E01: Peta Murgatroyd and Gilles Marini

© WENN / ABC



Emmitt Smith

Time to talk briefly to Len, who describes the premiere as the "best opening night ever" - he also defends the harsh judging, saying you have to do something special to get a 9 or 10. But his favourite dance was Emmitt and Cheryl's, so we get to see it again before speaking to the duo. Emmitt says he couldn't be the champion who turned down Dancing with the Stars - though dancing with Cheryl again is both a good and bad thing, since people have high expectations. He praises the atmosphere at the premiere, while Cheryl says that she couldn't have asked for anyone better to be partnered with - even though some of her former partners are in the competition! "That's smack talk wrapped around a compliment," Tom notes.

Dancing with the Stars 2012: Emmitt Smith

© ABC



Shawn Johnson

Shawn says she was "ecstatic" to get the call about All-Stars - she wanted a goal to work towards again, which she lost when she retired from gymnastics. But there's one problem - the height difference between her and Derek! To make things easier they sit on the floor - though we see a video of Derek pretending that he's lost Shawn in the studio. Tom wants to know how long it was before that got old - "After the first time," Shawn says resignedly. But she also reveals a secret from her first time on the show - she knocked Mark out cold in rehearsals! "Oops," she adds. Watch out, Derek...

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Shawn Johnson and Derek Hough

© WENN / ABC



Sabrina Bryan

Sabrina's looking for redemption after her premature exit from season five - she wanted to push herself and, guess what, win that trophy. But she admits that she's under extra pressure since the fans voted her back into the show as a wildcard. She says she's doing the whole season for them! And Louis is feeling nervous, too, because he doesn't want to let Sabrina down - "I can already feel those death threats if I don't live up to expectations!" he admits, adding that he's going to try to "tame her"... "I think you're up to the challenge," Tom admits.

Dancing With The Stars 2012: Sabrina Bryan

© ABC



Kirstie Alley

Kirstie reveals that she fell in love with dancing as a little girl, but gave up when she found out she wasn't allowed pointe shoes until she was 12! She doesn't want to let Maks down, but she says all she can do is her best. But Tom has a bone to pick with her - he jokes he had to sleep on the couch after she gave him a proper smacky kiss during the premiere! There's also a fun video of Kirstie and Maks spying on Gilles's rehearsals - but Maks isn't impressed when Gilles invites Kirstie to dinner "to teach her a couple of things" Maks can't! Kirstie also jokes that Gilles is the hot one, so she'll have to be the comedian. "Let's say we're the hot ones," Maks suggests. "That makes us comedians."

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy

© WENN / ABC



The Results

After a performance from the pros and the troupe - who dance to a mash-up of 'I Wanna Dance With Somebody' and 'Dance Again', it's time for our first results! The first dancers to discover their fate are Joey, Apolo, Bristol and Shawn, but before they find out, we get to see backstage footage from last night.

Joey talks about not knowing whether to "throw up, pee, fart, puke, poop" while at the end of their dance, Kym's just happy she didn't kick his face! But actually, she's nervous they could be leaving with their score of 20.5. Apolo says he had a "lot of fun" during the dance, while Karina thinks Carrie Ann's suggestion that he's now 3000 times sexier is the "best comment ever". Elsewhere, it's cute to see Mark urging Bristol to "shake it like [she's] never shaken it" during their performance, while Bristol's just happy not to be at the bottom of the board. Derek and Shawn are cute, too, as they call each other "chipmunk" and "giant" (I'll leave you to figure out who's who.)

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Karina Smirnoff and Apolo Anton Ohno

© WENN / ABC



But here are the results: the first couple safe are Shawn and Derek! Apolo and Karina are safe too, but Bristol and Mark discover they're in jeopardy. It's better news for Joey and Kym - they're safe too!

After a very glowsticky performance from Pitbull, Brooke chats with the next dancers to discover their fate - Hélio, Drew, and Kelly. Hélio is fine with the tougher scoring system - the judges need to focus on the detail, and they all need to step it up. Drew, meanwhile, points out that no-one is a sure thing in this season; anyone could go home. And Kelly says that though she's never danced a cha cha cha before, she just had to work hard and try her best.

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Pitbull

© WENN / ABC



Everyone nervously heads down to find out their fate, so we get to see some backstage action. Hélio thought that he "screwed up" because of nerves, though Chelsie reassures him. Meanwhile, we see Drew making a cute deal with Joey (he'll let Joey get to the top three before beating him), while Kelly admits that her first dance can't be worse than her first first dance - where she got a score of 13.

But time to find out who's safe and who's in jeopardy. The first couple definitely coming back are Hélio and Chelsie, while Kelly and Val are also safe. It's not such good news for Drew and Anna, who are in jeopardy - and the audience is not happy, booing to show their dissatisfaction. "Well, that went over well," Tom deadpans.

Next, we get to see a video of all the stars saying how much they want this and how challenging it is and how anyone could go home and all that kind of jazz, before another routine with this season's troupe. But then it's time for Emmitt, Gilles and Sabrina to discover their fate, although first they have a chat with Brooke. Sabrina admits that she might have overdanced because she was so excited, while Gilles confirms that he injured his hamstring recently (the adrenaline kicked in for him during the premiere). As for Emmitt, he did well but says he's working hard to raise the bar: "Every last one of these folks can dance and dance their behind off," he points out.

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas

© WENN / ABC



Backstage, though, we see Emmitt and Cheryl celebrating getting the highest score ("that's kind of unbelievable", Emmitt admits.) Meanwhile, Gilles says he think he looked the part (and "felt like a million bucks"), and Sabrina says before the dance that she's so excited she could pee her pants (lovely). She also says afterwards that she doesn't mind being compared to a hammer by Len: "I'm going to nail it." Oh snap!

Time for the results, and after mentioning Emmitt and Cheryl and Gilles and Peta, Tom and Brooke say: "You're all safe!" Unfortunately, this confuses Sabrina, who thinks she's got through as well, and there's lots of hugging and jumping up and down before Tom clarifies that he just meant Emmitt and Gilles are safe. But luckily, Sabrina and Louis are through too! "Unintentional drama," Tom drawls.

We get to move on from the insanity with a performance from Justin Bieber (the best bit is totally seeing Arie from The Bachelorette dancing and mugging at the camera). Then it's time for the final few couples to find out what's going on - Kirstie, Melissa and Pamela.

Dancing With The Stars S15E02: Justin Bieber

© WENN / ABC



In the backstage footage, Kirstie says she's like an alcoholic, but a danceaholic (and it's cute to see Maks coaching her through the dance). Melissa admits that she's "going to cry again" before her dance, but she's just pleased she didn't fall over and vows to use the feedback she got. But Pamela's really nervous, and apologises to Tristan for "screwing up so many things". He's sweet, though, telling her that her performance was better than rehearsal, which was better than before. Pamela admits that she's a "fish out of water" but says she just wants to stay on the show.

Let's find out if she can - results time! Kirstie and Maks are the first couple safe, as are Melissa and Tony (who weren't really listening, so are pretty surprised). But that does mean that Pamela and Tristan are in danger - along with Drew and Anna, and Bristol and Mark. Here we go - Bristol and Mark are safe... but Pamela and Tristan are not. They're the first to leave the competition!

Pamela admits that she was expecting it - "I was kind of ready for it" - but she vows to keep dancing with Tristan (who wouldn't want to dance with Tristan?) "It doesn't end here," she promises. So we've lost our first all-star - who'll be the next to say goodbye? The show continues Monday on ABC!

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